It is impossible to talk about chivalry without mentioning prowess. In all but modern chivalry, it was a basic requirement for knighthood. It was one of the core requirements for being a knight, and without chivalry loses it's origin.
Prowess is, first and foremost, defined as bravery or courage by the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. The secondary definition is a great skill or ability. These two parts of the definition have a lot of interplay. Without one, the other is greatly diminished in it's efficiency. Without courage, the skill gets unused. Without skill, courage has no way to proceed. In many ways, prowess means the courage and means to act on it. But each part of the definition takes with it some careful consideration.
Courage is something that takes a lot of forethought to understand. Many people think of courage as simply doing something without fear. That isn't courage, it's blind stupidity. Fear is there for a reason, to keep you safe from dangers. It's a built in defense mechanism to preserve yourself, and without it you wouldn't have made it this far.
Courage, simply put, is the ability to overcome your fears. To feel afraid, but let your own will and determination keep you moving forward. Being afraid means you've recognize and acknowledge dangers, but you don't let them control you. It takes a lot of thinking and consideration to recognize what makes you afraid, and what the dangers are. Barging in head on without recognizing dangers leaves you vulnerable to dangers you don't see or consider.
Courage also means the ability to do what must be done for the good of others. Sometimes it means doing things we don't want to do, for whatever reason. Even if it's boring, unglamorous, difficult, or just something we don't like doing. If it's what should be done, then it's worth doing. Frequently this means you might end up in situations you don't want to be in, but need to put your own desires away and help others.
Just as important as courage is skill. For the medieval knight, this meant skill at arms. Without this, entering a battle doesn't matter as the knight would die in mere moments. It was skill that kept him alive once he was brave enough to step on the field.
For the modern world, this doesn't mean that we all need to learn to use swords and axes, nor does it mean you have to become a martial arts master or sharpshooter. It means you do need to be able to defend yourself and others. In many ways, not just knowing how, but being in a physical condition to be able to do so. If you know how to defend someone, but are too out of shape to do so, it does no good. Conversely, if you are in a physical condition enough to help, but don't know what you're doing, you can do more harm than good. Knowledge of what to do is just as important.
For skill, regardless of innate ability, everyone needs a tutor of some sort. Someone that can reinforce fundamental skills, correct errors with an outside eye before they become too ingrained, and
can teach the next step. More than that, a tutor can teach many things that have nothing to do with the phyisical act of prowess. Many tutors will teach the philosophical and emotional sides of chivalry, which are equally important to prowess.
One of the chief reasons for a tutor is the ability to program the correct initial reflex. Reflexes can be trained to some degree. The problem with reflexes is that, when in a stress situation, we will always revert to the first way we learned it. If the response we first learned was flawed for some reason, in a crisis, we will revert to the flawed response. This could be just as dangerous as not knowing what to do. This is why a tutor or teacher is very important. Whether a structured or casual relationship, having someone knowledgeable that you can learn from is an invaluable resource.
In the modern world, hopefully there aren't that many times our personal prowess will be tested. Being able to respond in such a way to protect others and ourselves is crucial to make the world a better place.
"Ability is God given, but prowess is earned" John Harbaugh
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